Dear Pitchfork,

Regarding this:

9. Francis Scott Key's later musical endeavors were mostly religious music, including the forgettable "Before the Lord We Bow" and "Lord With Glowing Heart I'd Praise Thee." In fact, the fourth stanza of "The Star-Spangled Banner" refers to America as "the heaven-rescued land," namechecks "the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation," and even alters our national motto to fit his rhyming scheme: "In God is our trust." Key, dude, check the front of a nickel!

(Incidentally, that stanza also includes the war-mongering line "Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just." I'm surprised Orrin Hatch didn't bust that one out last fall, when the Senate was 'debating' whether to cede the power of declaration of war to the executive branch just for the fuck of it.)

You know how Dave Matthews Band fans sound when they try and talk about the White Stripes, or when some younger kid starts blathering about this band he's "discovered" called Fugazi? Yeah. That's how you sound when you try and talk about politics. Just so you know. I'm glad you're exercising your freedom of speech and whatnot, but...

Well, actually, let me amend the above. I'd have a lot more respect for it if you did sound like a kid who just discovered Fugazi. That would be good and positive and nice. But instead, you sound like a DMB fan talking about how the White Stripes suck because they're not all complex like DMB. Or, maybe more accurately, like a DMB fan talking about how Black Dice suck because it's just, like, noise, man. Because I agree with that, but at the same time I don't agree at all. You know what I mean?
posted by Mike B. at 10:40 AM 0 comments