clap clap blog: we have moved

Thursday, October 30, 2003
How NOT to post a guitarist-wanted ad. Via the nyhappenings list:

By 4 Piece looking for a lead guitarist to take over our singer's guitar duties so he can focus on singing. We play at places like Arlene's, CB's, Elbow, ACME etc. We're starting a record company and releasing an album w/in the next 3 months. Short jaunts around U.S. & Europe are planned. We have a lot of fun, but we're serious about what we do. You'll have plenty of opportunity to wail away and write your own stuff but sometimes we'll want you to play in the pocket. We r a prepackaged deal so we'll want you to learn our repertoir but you can definitley put your signature on it, add too it and be gigging pronto. We're classy, loud, good sounding & looking and we're going to make money w/or w/out u. All originals. Influences include: Alpha Blondy, Stones, Stooges, Tricky, VU, Discharge, Bowie, John Lee Hooker, P-Funk, N.E.R.D., Marley, Sabbath, Daft Punk etc. We'll also try to make you sing back-up vox even if you think you can't but if u really can't...then....we'll let you slide. Email your postal address to recieve a sample. Or just come to a rehearsal and check out our vibe. We rehearse Sunday evenings in the Lower East Side. Serious inquiries only. NO MERCENARIES!!!

Oh, OK. So it's a garage rock trip-hop psych glam blues funk R&B reggae metal house sound? Nice! You definitely won't be attracting any mercenaries that way, kids, given your strong vision and sound. It's not like, say, you're throwing out such a mismash of favorite records that the only people you'll attract will be the ones drawn to the more specific recording-and-touring bits. Not at all. Thank god!